24 hours of childhood trauma

     Today I felt the urge to document the past 24 hours in my house. Panda has a three week track break from her school. Poodaloo will be off school starting tomorrow through the week of Thanksgiving. They are both going to a local gym for day camp tomorrow. Am I glad? You better believe it.

     Any change in regular routine is difficult for Panda (as with most kids who have experienced pre-verbal trauma). At school they have a set routine posted on the board. This is very comforting for Panda. I've tried doing the same at home. It does help her but I'm lousy at keeping it current. Posting the monthly school lunch menus in the kitchen is a stretch for me.

     During track break, multiple times each day she asks me 'what are we doing today?' If there is anything she especially likes on the agenda, it must be done NOW. She gets agitated with any delay. I attempt not to allow her to control when things happen but it is exhausting. We have been together for two weeks now, with another ten days to go. Twice a week she goes to the day camp so I get a break.

     Yesterday was a camp day with swimming at a local pool. When we arrived at the gym, Panda informed me she did not have her swim suit because I said I'd get it for her and I did not get it. Fortunately, there was time to return home and fetch the swimming suit before the campers departed.

     Poodaloo had not been feeling well and I let her stay home from school. She is a model sick kid and is perfectly happy watching TV. I worked in my sewing room and did laundry most of the day. I suspected Panda would not be happy to learn Poodaloo had stayed home with me. Boy, did I get that right. Panda complained about Poodaloo's sick day for (what seemed like) hours.

     Baba has worked late all this week. He gets home in time to see the girls briefly before they go to bed. This is another change of routine which has Panda on edge. As the girls got ready for bed, Panda realized one of the blankets was missing from her bed. (Both girls sleep on pads in our bedroom.) I said it was downstairs because I had used it to cover Poodaloo when she was cold.

     That was all it took to cause total dysregulation. She screamed and threw things around the bedroom. Baba ran upstairs to see what was going on. I asked him to bring up the purple blanket on the couch. He returned with the wrong blanket. Screaming and fit pitching again. Finally the purple blanket was upstairs for her but she could not calm down. Poodaloo was afraid to get into her bed (right beside Panda's bed). Baba offered to lay down between them. I read a couple chapters in a book, as usual. Reading has always been a resource we've used to help her regulate.

     The night was relatively quiet and both girls slept without waking. In the morning, Panda snuggled up to me for a few minutes. She then followed Baba about the house. Eventually, Poodaloo awoke. She crawled into bed with me. Then Panda came into the room and saw her with me. I scooted over so Panda could lay on my other side. Each of the girls tried to get more than half of my body space by inching out the other. This is not a relaxing thing so I quickly got out of bed.

     I went down stairs to make coffee and start breakfast for the girls. Poodaloo is not much for eating breakfast but she will always drink a cup of warm chocolate soy milk. I figure that is a pretty good dose of protein and don't worry too much if she doesn't eat anything more. Panda does not like to eat in the morning. She really NEEDS to eat a good serving of protein to stay regulated. I made sausage patties for them. There was a smidgen of hamburger in the refrigerator so I mixed it into the sausage meat before making the patties.

     When the sausage was cooked I called the girls to come eat. Panda wanted to know if the patties were sausage only. I explained about adding a tiny bit of hamburger. She would have nothing to do with eating because she 'hates hamburger'. It isn't possible to force her to eat so I asked her to please find some kind of protein she wanted to eat. (Yes, this is a common morning battle.) She likes to eat turkey pepperoni with cheese melted on it. She made herself a plate with a dozen or so pepperoni pieces on it.

     It was time to get in the car and take Poodaloo to school (we had not been ready to catch the bus because of the sausage fiasco). Panda carried her plate of pepperoni into the garage so she could finish eating in the car. Poodaloo followed behind her with her backpack. She accidently bumped Panda and it knocked the plate of pepperoni onto the floor. It shattered. Panda got hysterical. I remained calm though and asked her to please make herself more pepperoni. We walked back into the house together (I had to get the broom). Got it cleaned up and Panda came back into the garage, still muttering about Poodaloo bumping her on purpose so she would drop the plate.

     It is a few days after I wrote the previous part of this post. Surprisingly, not much has been said about the plate incident. I am certain it will be mentioned again at some point. Both girls have been home together for six days now. Today, the girls were really snipey and nasty to each other. I was tempted to leave home but couldn't think of anywhere to escape. 

    We had a plan to fetch J-Bear from her daycare and go to see a movie. I was not particularly in the mood for the outing, but staying home seemed a worse option. We went to the cheap theatre and saw 'Brave' because it had a family friendly rating stamp on the theatre website.

     Good grief - I cannot imagine the criteria for family friendly. It was very scary!! By the end, Poodaloo was in my lap crying, Panda was clinging to my arm and J-Bear was sitting on Panda's lap. Everything turned out hunky dory in the end so we gave it a 'so-so' rating. Then I delivered all three kids to my sister's house for the night. Yippee!!!!

Dare I write this?

     Panda has experienced an huge leap in emotional stability. Hardly any throwing things. She can often stop herself before she explodes in anger. This has been over the past several weeks. Her recent therapy sessions have focused on working through a book called, What to Do When You Grumble Too Much.

     We aren't sure if this book has wrought the change but the timing is right. Could be all the strategies we've worked on the past year are finally coming to fruition. Perhaps is it a result of her Baba resigning from his job and landing another job. He is so much more relaxed and engaged in family stuff without the stress from work.

     I suppose it doesn't actually matter. We are thankful for the changes, no matter the source! We love her so much!

Panda and her gigantic cabbage. All third graders in the school district receive a cabbage to grow over the summer.

School carnival

     The next big event was the school carnival. It was held on a Friday night. I don't know how the faculty and staff can be so cheerful and excited on a Friday night.

Hoping to win a cake.

Panda is in a purple-blue shirt in the center. She's wearing colorful sandals.

The cake walk markers were countries from around the world (instead of numbers).

One activity included glitter in the hair and face painting.

Of course, there was food. She can't eat the bun but that just meant more room for  hot dogs. Panda ate four  dogs! (We ate dinner before going to the carnival.)

Poodaloo takes aim for that teeny, tiny hole.

     They also have a silent auction. I love silent auctions! Unfortunately, I 'won' several items - including a new cordless drill. I thought the item was a $90 gift card from Lowes. I was sure someone would outbid.

     I don't need another cordless drill. If YOU need a cordless drill, give me a shout - I will make you a really good deal. Really, . . . . call me!

The Easter bunny was busy

     It was a gorgeous Easter weekend here. The girls love to hunt for and dye eggs. We celebrated with the Girl Scout troop families on Saturday. Spent Easter Sunday at church and then with my sister's family.

A first this year ~ we let the kids colored eggs at the party. Panda is in the middle in green shirt. Poodaloo is on the far right.

Must make time for some horse play!
(Action shots are my very favorite style of photo. It's a special treat to capture one.)

And ~ they are off!!

Panda strikes gold.

Poodaloo and M count their booty. Only 12 eggs allowed per kid.

     The next day it was off to church and brunch with the family. The church egg hunt has a twist. The kids hunt for cans of food. They exchange the canned food for a book. The food is donated to the congregation food bank. (Forgot to bring camera.)

     An egg hunt with Aunt Shaw has been the tradition since Panda's first Easter with us. Shaw takes a special photo of Panda and the sunflower each year. See how she has grown. (Have I mentioned my sis has a blog? She's far more prolific at posting.)

Papparazzi capture the digital moment.

It's cookie time

     Panda and Poodaloo belong to a non-traditional Girl Scout troop. It is non-traditional because all the girls are from families who have adopted from China. Typically, troop members are from the same school & neighborhood. This troop was formed to provide the girls with friends who have similar backgrounds (a peer group, if you will) and the girls attend different schools. As hoped, it has worked out beautifully for the girls.

     What we didn't anticipate was the support group it also brings to the moms. These wonderful ladies know the challenges of raising kids with traumatic backgrounds. Each of these dear friends has helped me through tough times more than once.

     Last weekend, we manned a cookie booth for three hours on a blustery day. The girls were excited and enthusiastic. They more than made up for the moms' lack of genuine enthusiasm.

      We are bringing a small-ish supply of cookies when we visit Grandma over spring break. $3.75 per box. Checks and cash accepted.

     Both girls are signed up for Girl Scout horse camp this summer! It will be four days without parents but the pull of horses is strong and they are confident of being okay. Cookie sales will fund a portion of the camp (we hope).

100% chance of sunshine

     Today was a gorgeous day, the best one of the year. Our friends Z & M invited us to the neighborhood park to play. Poodaloo and I accepted the invitation in an instant. We gathered up some snacks and water and made tracks down the street.

     Panda had gone with Baba to a meeting at church. It was a training on the 'ins and outs' of making coffee for the Sunday services. Panda likes to help when its our turn to ensure there is coffee available. Turns out the training was BORING. Her texts flew in such rapid succession I could not reply before a new one arrived. Because I didn't answer, phone calls began. After half a dozen calls (Where is Poodaloo's bike helmet? Does she have to wear one? What if we can't find it?) she arrived at the park to join us.

     All told, we spent more than two hours enjoying the sunshine. Hoagie came along and snoozed at my feet in the sun. At bedtime I noticed my chest is slightly reddened. So there you have it ~ first sunburn of the season on March 4!

The minutiae of life

     Lots happening the past few weeks. Here are the highlights (or low lights in some cases).

     Teeth continue to haunt our home. The tooth fairy has our house bookmarked. Poodaloo finally lost her other front tooth. The bad news:  she swallowed it. The good news:   the tooth fairy is a trusting sort and she trusts a tooth was lost when there is a note left where the tooth should be.

Dear: tooth Fairy, I swallowed my tooth and am hoping that it will come out the rear end. 
Date: 1-2-2012
Love

Be sure to notice the dot on the I in Fairy and the O and E in Love are shaped like teeth.

     Panda has also lost teeth. One the natural way and another had help. This morning the dentist pulled a primary molar because its misbehaving. The orthodontist is placing another appliance in her mouth to keep the space open. The new one is for the lower jaw. Her current spacer is located on the upper teeth.

     Gigi's big adventure. When I leave Poodaloo's room after putting her to bed, Gigi is waiting by the door. She rolls onto her back so I can rub her belly. Last week I felt something unnatural on her stomach area. More than unnatural, it was weird and icky. It looked like a fishing hook and I kinda freaked out. How could she get a fishing hook into her skin?!?! We don't own any fishing poles or hooks.

     Baba and I determined it was indeed stuck into her skin. Gentle tugs did not dislodge the hook. It didn't seem to be the slightest bit painful. We are tired parents of elementary school aged kids. It could wait until morning. Zzzzzzzz

     Gigi went to the vet before the girls got to the bus stop. It was a very strange circular piece of metal about the size of a penny. There is a small shaved patch of skin and not even a scab remains. We have no idea where the metal originated. The only thing remaining is fear of finding another oddity when I pet her belly each night.

     Living the gluten-free, casein-free life. I am enjoying the challenge of finding alternatives for family favorite dinners. I've made cream of mushroom sauce for Tater Tot casserole. Spaghetti with rice or corn pasta is great. Creamy potato soup without milk is not so good.

     The biggest success is finding a way to tolerate protein powder in smoothies. I can more or less manage to eat an adequate amount of protein for breakfast. They recommend 20-30 grams of protein. An ounce of meat or one egg has seven grams of protein. Do the math ~ four ounces of meat or four eggs. I cannot choke down eat that much meat or eggs for breakfast.

     Dynamic Dancing Dragons perform. The girls danced for the Lunar New Year celebration at Poodaloo's school. They also performed at a Spring Festival celebration sponsored by the local Chinese community. My camera is too basic to get stellar photos but these are acceptable. Enjoy!

High school boys performing the Dragon Parade to begin the Festival.

Two young men from the local air force base performed the Lion Dance next.

Panda's group dancing. She is fourth from the left.

Poodaloo is in the center (just to left of the boy in black). 

They are singing a song from the 2008 Olympics in Beijing.

Flying high . . . . or maybe not

     Panda's class was one of several third grades invited to create paintings to illustrate a story. Panda's illustration of the Mississippi river was selected. She received a free ticket to attend the concert. Since Panda cannot drive, Mama was her chauffeur.

     An exerpt from a press release:  In Stella’s Musical Tour of America, Stella establishes herself as a brave adventurer with an active imagination. From a hot air balloon, in just one day she sees the Mississippi River, Rocky Mountains, Pacific Ocean and finally the Grand Canyon before returning home. Along the way, the audience will hear the music Stella hears in her head as she discovers these amazing features.

     They raffled a free hot air balloon ride. Panda filled out an entry form. But it said you had to be 18 years old to enter so we used my name. On the following Monday I received a call from the Philharmonic office. I assumed they wanted me to collect her artwork. This thought annoyed me.

     However, that was not why they called. I had won the hot air balloon raffle. I might have said, "Oh, no!" on the phone to the nice philharmonic lady when she told me the news (but I hope not). I would rather poke a needle in my eye than go up high in a tiny basket.

     At least I can't say I've never won anything!

Good-bye January

     Tonight on the news, the announcer called this month Jun-uary because its been as warm as June in many parts of the U.S. We are part of the 'many places'. Bushes & other flora are beginning to show signs of life. Yikes! Don't they know that Jun-uary is made up? It isn't really spring, go back to sleep for a couple months.

     We have been busy with life but nothing too exciting. The girls are taking cold lunches to school as part of the gluten-free changes. They think this is wonderful because cold lunch kids eat earlier than the poor schmoes who have to wait in line for hot lunch. Eating quicker means you get more time to play.

Panda helping pack lunch in the morning.

     Free time is often spent taking self-portraits. Below are examples of the portraits.

    My free time is spent quilting if I can make it happen. The top is finished for the quilt challenge blocks.

 I'm also making blocks of the Building Block series from the Cotton Club. The fabric is batik - my most favorite kind of fabric. I am powerless against the pull of batiks.

Top row: log cabin blocks, bottom row: Jacob's ladder.

     Panda and Poodaloo are taking a Chinese dance class after school on Wednesdays. The dance troupe is set to perform at the Lunar New Year celebration on February 4. (We wish you all could join us!)  To advertise the event, a local news station broadcast weather segments from the school last Friday morning. The kids were to arrive at 4:30a.m. (yes, A. freaking M.) Panda was raring to go, leaped out of bed and dressed. Poodaloo was not ready or willing to go at this ridiculous time of day.

     In the end, I drove Panda to school and went back home to coax Poodaloo. As I suspected, when she saw the dancers on T.V. Poodaloo was up in a flash. I trundled her off to school and stayed for a respectable few minutes. Then I headed home for a nap and to pack lunches.

     Unfortunately, I'm not able to locate a way to see the segments on the station website. If anyone has better luck, let me know. The station is KTVB.

November - already?!?!

     Halloween has come and gone. The decorations are stowed away for next year (except the witch hats, which are mighty fun props). The candy treats are almost gone.

     We have experienced the first snow fall. Panda's school is on a track break for three weeks in November. They had a fall program the last day of school. It was an entertaining variety show with a play, songs and comedians. Panda played Sally in 'The Great Pumpkin'.

Sally (aka Panda) in The Great Pumpkin

 Pooda plays in the snow wearing a fancy dress and heels.

The maple leaves have turned (and fallen by the time of this post). 

Play activities move indoors with a skyscraper made of Lincoln Logs.

Another sign it is getting cold, Diva and Buddy have moved indoors for snoozing.

Because there is no such thing as being too close to the screen. (I don't understand why anyone would do this . . . . )

 A last stint of outdoor play with shorts & bare feet. Baba included in photo for reference so the viewer can gauge height of the handmade play structure.

Pooda crashes at the top of the stairs. Yes, she is asleep. 

Removing slimy seeds from the pumpkins. Still warm enough for shirt sleeves.

Dental update

     The oral surgery went off without a hitch . . . . as long as you don't call these hitches:

     Pooda told Panda they would poke a needle into her stomach and take out blood. Eeek! Not exactly a story to put fears to rest. There was a monitor on her stomach so that's probably what Pooda remembered. And stories are always better if there is blood involved. Particularly if the blood comes out of your stomach . . . .

     Or this:  Baba woke up at 6:15 and said he was sick. He was supposed to drive Pooda to Aunt Shaw's house. But he could barely walk, much less drive a car safely. A quick 6:30 am phone call and we had a new plan. J-Bear and her dad would drive over to fetch Pooda for a play date.

     Yesterday, Panda and I took a class field trip to the botanical garden. It started out very rainy but had blown over by the time the bus arrived. They learned about seeds, dissected lima beans, gathered seeds from the garden, and snacked on exploded endosperm (a.k.a. popcorn).

Squirrels, scallow eggs and teeth

Squirrels:     Hogan found a dead squirrel in our back yard. The news of such interesting road kill travelled quickly - Buddy & Diva soon joined Hogan to investigate the corpse. Panda and Pooda were at sleep-overs and Baba was working late. That left me to dispose of the squirrel. Ugh !
     Squirrel bodies are a lot bigger than you would think and I didn't want to touch it. I tried covering it with newspaper and rocks. Hoagie, Buddy and Diva continued to paw at it. My next attempt was covering it with a yard bucket, topped by a large rock. None of these kept my animals away from it. After (an embarrassingly long amount of) a time, it occured to me to use a shovel to pick up the darn thing.
     I dumped the squirrel into the backyard garbage can. The first thing Pooda said when she looked into the can: "Mom, it was a boy squirrel!" (Male squirrels are quite well-endowed.) Between Friday and Monday, the squirrel-in-the-trash-can was popular viewing by Pooda and her 'friends who are boys, not boyfriends'.

Scallow Eggs:     It's a treat to travel alone in the car with Pooda. She is full of insightful observations and shares them freely. Not long ago, Pooda told me about her favorite TV show on Disney channel. It's called Jake and the Neverland Pirates. It seems pirates have their own lexicon and Pooda was eager to tell me some of the words pirates use.

Pooda: "Mom, one thing pirates call people is scallow egg. A scallow egg is someone who makes trouble."
Mom: "I think the word is scalliwag."
Pooda: "No, it is scallow egg."
Mom: "Okay."

Teeth:    Last week Panda complained of a sore tooth. She said it was one with the orthodontic spacer attached (upper left molar). It was a couple of days before we could get into the orthodontist office. During the wait, a bottom molar fell out.
     At the ortho's office, they decided the culprit was a neighboring tooth. It has a cavity and needs come out. They referred us to our regular pediatric dentist, who looked at the x-ray and said to to an oral surgeon. The oral surgeon takes it out on Friday morning. Pooda had this surgeon remove a tooth last fall and she has assured Panda that it will be a piece of cake.
     Meanwhile, Pooda had a very loose front tooth. She wiggled & jiggled it all weekend. Monday she chewed a big wad of gum, hoping to get the tooth to fall out. The gum worked and the tooth came out. She is eagerly practicing All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth.
     Last night, J-Bear called to say she lost a tooth, too. The good news is all the missing teeth are supposed to come out. They are not the kind which cost several thousand dollars to replace.

Lake Tahoe

    We are enjoying a family week in Lake Tahoe. Baba is going home today because he has to work. The girls and I are staying the week. Baba is supposed to remember to feed the cats and water all the flower pots - every day. Every day will be the challenging part, especially for the flowers. The cats are fairly pesky and loud so I'm not too worried about them. The dogs are staying elsewhere until the end of the week.

     We have been busy, busy the past couple of weeks. Valerie had a birthday party, we spent a few days in McCall with the Girl Scout troop. Next thing I knew, we were on the road toward Lake Tahoe. Baba is taking his laptop home with him so more posts are not likely until we are back at home.

     It is gorgeous at Tahoe. Nanner, nanner, nanner . . .

Warp-speed internet, etc

     The new TV unleashed a torrent. The local cable company made an offer we could not refuse: faster internet. The package includes phone service and cable TV. Panda and Pooda have become addicts, surfing back and forth between Disney and Nickolodeon. Mama hates cable already.
     Warm weather has taken us outdoors for gardening and summer camps. Panda & Pooda attended a week long Girl Scout day camp after swimming lessons finished. They also spent time at zoo camps. Mama started ripping out sod and moving pea gravel. Ugh . . . it is physically tiring work but rewarding to see the result.
     Baba went to Denver for a weekend conference for fathers who are learning the new parenting paradigm of Beyond Consequences.
     The ladies went out of town with my sister and her family (the weekend Baba was away). Pooda's favorite thing was hiking in the woods. She and J-Bear loved exploring behind the cabin. We roasted marshmallows for s'mores. Hot dogs are always better warmed up over a fire. There was a quilt store nearby and also a hot springs swimming pool. It was a small slice of paradise less than two hours from home. We plan to make this an annual event. My camera did not make it into the car so no photos until my sister shares hers.
     This week Panda stayed over at her friend J's house. Pooda had a triple sleep-over with J-Bear (not the same person as J). Tomorrow (Saturday) both girls come home again. No doubt it will seem pretty dull around here after such exciting adventures.

We dumped the box

     Want a free converter box? Our family made a small upgrade in electronics. We bought a 32" digital TV. Baba doesn't know about Phase 2 yet. For Phase 2, we will go totally bonkers and buy a Wii.

Baba testing the remote (old TV did not have remote)

Who cares about the TV when there's a large box available.

The girls helped sort clothes this week. I think it is a chore that never ends. They think it is fun.

     Photos can be tricky when you are a photo dunce like me. How did I not notice a bra dangling from Pooda's hand? Take 2 and Pooda is hidden. There was a third attempt. Panda was not a happy camper at that point. Photo #3 belongs on the cutting room floor.

     Warm weather means craft projects on the patio. Panda & Pooda have been waiting for warmth because mama doesn't allow painting in the house. The wreath is designed in hopes of attracting a nesting bird like last year. There was more Spanish moss than needed so Panda got creative (and grew an extra pair of arms).

     We've also put out the hummingbird feeders. I am forty shades of green with envy because a hummingbird has nested at my sister's house. It's not fair . . . . .